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Throwback Thursday: Old World of Warcraft Raid Rules

Old World of Warcraft Raid Rules

With the new Blizzcon announcements making waves for the future of World of Warcraft, we would like to present some “throwback” content for you. Back almost a decade ago (penned in 2010), one of our die-hard WoW players wrote a “raid bible.” How much of this have you experienced? Have things really changed? Sit back and relax; enjoy a flashback to end-game Wrath of the Lich King era raid politics!

Hello, and welcome to Angry Anmut’s Raid Biblethe comprehensive guide to being full of win and void of fail. Let’s get started!

Throwback Thursday: Old World of Warcraft Raid Rules

Chapter One: Social Networking in MMORPGS –
How to Win Friends and Influence People

1. Don’t Lie
Cat on fire? FBI at the door? While this first and foremost cardinal rule might seem painfully obvious, I assure you (to some raiders) it’s not. At all. Whether it be a complete comstockery reason for a roster absence or even something seemingly harmless, say it with me: Don’t lie. You’ll always be found out in the end, and even if the lie is for a good reason, someone’s feelings will always be hurt. If you don’t feel like making a roster, just say so. Tired of raiding? Just say so. Don’t like the asshole raid leader? Just. Say. So. None of this “Uh, I’m really burned out on raiding and my cat needs more attention” stuff. Just tell the truth.

1b. Don’t Forget Your Lie
I know… I know there are some who will disregard number one entirely. For those of you, here we are at 1b. While sometimes you may tell a little white lie to save feelings, remember it and stick with it. If you tell someone that you are burnt out on raiding and want to take a break, don’t show up on another raid roster. Not only does that piss off your former raid leader and everyone on the old roster, it speaks REALLY negatively of your character and it will be remembered well into the future. No matter how secret you try to keep your new cool kid’s roster, you’ll be found out. Noticing a trend?

2. Don’t Bite the Hand that Feeds You
Again, I know this seems simple. But out of all the personal experiences with the issue, I assure you, kind reader, it’s as common as air. Being that games like Warcraft are social by nature, it would do players well to not piss off every one beneficial to them. Note the helpful people in your guild or group: the people who provide consumables, the people who drop what they’re doing to help with quests or activities, the people who provide goods or materials at little to no cost, the people who provide services at little to no cost. These are the people you should not slight, especially if you are self-serving. There is another, smaller subgroup to the beneficial people category: raid leads. Whether the content is new or old, eventually there will be a raid you want to attend that has something you want. You want those bug mounts from Ahn’Qiraj and your RL mentions an AQ-centric questline needing Black Wing Layer? Get your cloak, let’s kill some dragons! Remember kids: the people who help you sometimes will need help themselves; and if you don’t show the same amount of care to their endeavors and needs as they do to yours, well it doesn’t look like there are any Battle Tanks in your future.

3. The Raid Comes Before the Individual
This is a point with no negotiation. In every raid, we are met with several categories of people: the loot whores, the hoarders, the contenders, the chiefs, and the dead weight. All of these will be explained in more detail in following chapters. The two to be the most aware of when discussing raid needs, are most often loot whores and hoarders. These are the people who will either adorn themselves with gear they do not need or hoard their DKP and spend it like a single man in a strip joint with a fist full of dollars whenever the dancer everyone wants to grope takes the stage. What I mean by that is this: an item of upgrade or high desire for other players drops, and our DKP hoarder bids on it (gaining no major upgrades from the item) just to take it from other players. Then (normally) after taking loot that would be majorly beneficial away from other raid members, he or she will turn around and snidely bitch about how all the other said raid members suck and do terrible DPS/healing/etc. The other closely linked problem child is the loot whore. Its +hit cloth and you’re a holy priest? SCREW THOSE DPS CASTERS! ITS PURPLE AND “I” WANT IT BECAUSE IT LOOKS GOOD WITH THESE PANTS, AND I’M A ROLEPLAYER DAMMIT! These people generally want items just because they are purple and/or rare. And the loot whore will happily take it from people who need it for improvement just so they are able to link that phat loot to others. In all of these cases, it is the ABSOLUTE JOB of the raid leader, master looter, or raid assists to nip this shit in the bud IMMEDIATELY. Your raid is only as strong as its weakest failtard, and letting the top geared players continually take loot from your lesser geared players means failure for everyone.

4. Always Defend Your Friends
Nothing is harder to find online, much less in a game, than loyalty. Do your best as a person to be fair, and just remember that there are real people on the other end of that ethernet cable. Also, whenever your friends come under fire, be a good friend in return. Was someone wronged? Take appropriate actions to right the wrong without besmirching your guild or group. Always represent your guild well and represent your friends even better.

4b. Remember Your Guild Tag
So you pride yourself on being an internet asshole? Awesome! Trade always needs more inventive trolls, just don’t troll on your guild-associated toon. In an age of shift+click, your guild tag says a lot about you. You should always, always, ALWAYS do your best to represent the behavior that your guild finds important. Make some cheap bags to take to the starter zones for new players, always dismount to buff same faction loners or groups you come across. Taking a few seconds to help improve someone else’s gaming experience not only give you the warm-and-fuzzies but when that warrior you fort-buffed in Tirisfal becomes the server’s best tank, you want them to remember your guild tag with fondness and love when you send them a tell to come to your progression raid. Nothing you do ends with you; every action you take sends ripples of action out through the World (of Warcraft). Remember, the beat of your pet moth’s wings in the Orgrimmar Auction House may cause a catastrophic wave that destroys Stormwind Harbor. Don’t be that dick.

And as always: Don’t stand in the fire.

Coming Soon! Chapter 2: Idiot Raid Mistakes and You – How to Not Be Laughed at In /tells


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About the author

Shatter

Alexis is the lead fabricator and designer for Shattered Stitch Cosplay, based out of Tennessee. She has been in the cosplay community over 10 years and is a familiar face at cons large and small all across the Southeast US.

Alexis is a consummate nerd with her genres of expertise and interest being concentrated in Marvel comics and World of Warcraft. Also on her interest list is Top Cow, Aspen, DarkHorse, and DC, as well as most all videogames with her personal concentration being PC gaming (Master Race).

Her costumes span everything from comics and fantasy books to live action, including: Final Fantasy, Game of Thrones, Hunger Games, Studio Ghibli, and Conan.

If you’d like to nerd cred check, step right up and give it a swing. You’ll receive your consolation prize as you exit stage left.

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