Review – South Park: Phone Destroyer

South Park: Phone Destroyer

Yet again, we are taken to a quiet little mountain town for an adventure befitting the South Park universe. In South Park: Phone Destroyer, you once again assume the role of the ‘new kid’ and are called on by Cartman to help him win a game. 

New Kid

We just recovered from the hilarity that was South Park: Fractured But Whole when we were graced with Phone Destroyer on November 9th. Cartman calls us to join him and the Cowboys in a war against the Indians. The game starts off as a classic Cowboys vs. Indians scenario, then quickly spirals out of control as pirates slowly get introducedthen aliens, robots, mages, programs, spells, and much more. 


At its core, South Park: Phone Destroyer is a strategy card game. If you have ever played Magic, Hearthstone, or any similar game, then you will understand the basics. There are different types of cards in the game. Cowboys and Indians, Sci-fi, Magical, Generic, and more. You can only have two types of cards in your deck at a time. Each type has a specialty. Holy cards heal, and Sci-fi cards are the king of crowd control.

You build your deck and summon your units to the battlefield using the energy you gain over time. 

South Park: Phone Destroyer Screen 01Story

The basic gist is you are the ‘new kid’ who is always on his cellphone. Cartman wants to take advantage of you always using your phone to make money. Kyle wants you to get off your phone. This is a classic Kyle vs. Cartman storyline with many fun twists and turns.

The story involves a few great cutscenes at key moments in the game. Classic South Park troupes are rehashed in fun new ways. Occasionally you will get video calls from different characters, which are neat, to say the least. 

Yet, most of the story takes place through a group text message. It is great to see our favorite characters interact in such a hilarious and relatable way. 

The biggest dilemma with the story for some of my friends is that there are many PVP locks on continuing the story. Occasionally Butters will force you to win a set number of PVP matches before progressing. 


PVP is fast-paced and fun. Even if you lose, it is over so fast that it doesn’t come off as a big deal. Yet, when you have to win four games to progress the story and are not good at PVP it can become frustrating. 

You get a free pack of cards every four hours which can stack up to two times. In PVP, you get a pack for winning three PVP matches. Grabbing your PVP pack, a four-hour timer starts until you can earn another pack. 


Phone Destroyer is not groundbreaking and brings nothing surprising to the table. That being said, it is still a solid game that is a lot of fun to play if you are a South Park fan. 

The self-aware humor of the game is the biggest appeal and even that is nothing new for cellphone games. I hate to say it, but I need to: “The Simpsons did it first!”

All in all, the game is a blast with an insane amount of replayability. 

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About the author

Hans Goss

Hans was a US Army Airborne Infantryman with the 82nd Airborne and is now an avid gamer and writer. You can often find him live on Twitch under his gaming handle Fugio.

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