Magic Cantina

The Magic Cantina: No Strings Attached

It all started with a text from Black Bolt.  The leader of the Inhumans had recently agreed to volunteer at the Disney communal cafeteria for characters by setting up tables and chairs each morning.  Within the first week he tried to call in sick (Medusa apparently had a hair appointment) and the destructive power of his voice destroyed half of the Disney backlot.  Once repairs had begun, an agreement was reached that should he need to miss work again, a text would suffice.  This time his excuse was that his giant cosmic dog Lockjaw actually had a case of lockjaw (lame) and that he needed to take him to The Daytime Vet (who shares a practice with the Night Nurse) immediately.  However, Kermit the Frog and the rest of the management staff were wise to his tricks and suspected that he was sneaking off to get in line for the premiere of the Avengers’ new film.

Not ten minutes later, we received a phone call from Aunt May telling us that her poor nephew Peter had a bad reaction from yet ANOTHER spider bite and that he wouldn’t be able to fulfill his contract to deliver meals to homebound characters (such as Modok and The Blob) because he was running a fever and needed a good home cooked meal of her amazing Wheatcakes.

Once a few people call in sick on the same day, it begins a chain reaction that causes the entire business to fall apart.  Ghost Rider and Johnny Storm were suddenly unavailable to make their early shift toasting buns.  Gonzo the Great (our greeter) came down with a case of the bird flu (not really surprising) overnight and Sleeping Beauty had “run out of her narcolepsy medication” and was not able to come in to bus tables.

When Greedo phoned in with a basketball injury (this wouldn’t constantly happen if he didn’t always insist on shooting first) and asked to be excused from his dishwashing duties for the day, followed by an email from The Watcher claiming that he had a freelance “Watching” job come up, it was decided to simply shut The Magic Cantina down for the day so that we all could support our friends The Avengers by going to see their new film, Age of Ultron.
027.No Strings AttachedApparently, not everyone got the memo.  We apologize if you were inconvenienced by our sudden closure and request that you send all complaints in writing to our complaint department, which is run by Mark Driscoll and Brent Kincade.  They should be back to work in the morning.  It seems that they both had flat tires on the same day and ironically, neither of them had spares.

The Magic Cantina will reopen for business bright and early tomorrow with a full staff because we are no longer answering the phones.

About the author

Brent And Mark

One is the brain behind Word of the Nerd's "That Time On..." series of features, the other is...well...Mark. Together they have yet to come up with a clever nick name, so for now, they will just be known as "Brent and Mark"

About the author

Mark Driscoll

When not ranting about the current state of his favorite comics or working on The Magic Cantina, Mark spends a majority of his time renovating his newly purchased, 120 year old Victorian house. Badly. He is very bad at talking about himself in the third person, as he thinks it make him sound pretentious.

About the author

Brent Kincade

Brent Kincade was born under the sign of Pertwee and has often wondered if there was an alternate universe where Aquaman was instead called Waterhombre. He also spends a fair amount of his waking life patiently waiting for friends to mention a Thunderdome so he can roll his eyes and plead, "Can't we just get BEYOND Thunderdome??" (Six times, thus far.)

His first comic book was Spidey Super Stories #4 in 1974, his first Star Trek episode was "City On The Edge of Forever" in 1975, his first Doctor Who was "The Visitation" in 1984.

Once when he was young, he stashed his vinyl Halloween Spider-Man costume in the neighbor lady's shrubs and was later caught red-handed, crawling into the shrubs to change into costume because he had, "Heard a cry for help".

He's a father, an artist, a graphic designer, a cartoonist, and usually pretty handy in a pinch. Brent is the creator of #ThatTimeOnDrWho, #ThatTimeOnStarTrek, #ThatTimeOnStarWars and co-creator of "The Magic Cantina". Brent requests the story of his days be co-written by Harlan Ellison, Steven Moffat and Neil Gaiman, drawn by John Romita, scored by Ben Folds and riffed on by the fine folks at Mystery Science Theater 3000.

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